Old Flames Part II

I have this feeling that because of the way my relationship with Nathan ended, there are all these untied strings I'll never be able to sort out. This, I feel, is why I keep having old memories fly into my head.

.... Nathan and I begun to hang out more and more. We would hang out together after school. I would go to soccer practice, which he would walk me to. And he would go to play rehearsal. Some days soccer would get out early or I wouldn't have practice that day and I would go see him. At first I was shy and would just sneak over to the auditorium to see him. But Nathan brought me once down to the pit and showed me what he was up to. (We were sophomores by the way.) It was in the evening and I had flip flops and shorts on. A big no no around a 'construction site'. Nathan was a part of construction crew for the play and he wanted to show me around. If Dempsey- the teacher- had found out I was back there, I probably would have gotten in trouble, but Nathan and I didn't care. Well... Nathan didn't care, I like to be the obedient one and I was terrified I would get in trouble. Nevertheless, I still stayed, and she never showed up. I didn't know anyone and was and violently introduced to the theatre departments personality.

Random girl talking to some guy: "Hey hold your hand up and spread your finger apart."
Confused he does. She takes out a measuring device and measures from pinky to thumb.
"Nope not the biggest." She looks at Nathan and orders him to do the same thing. . . "Yep Nathan's is the biggest so far!"
Laughter. And a bit of an embarrassed face on Nathan. A very little bit.
I didn't get it. I thought I did and felt very uncomfortable. Nathan noticed my embarrassment and told me "not to worry, just ignore them."
And since it was Nathan. Just hearing him say that was enough for me. Maybe this type of introduction doesn't seem violent to you, but I was particularly sheltered and protected from crass and sexual conversations. Which I am glad of, although I wish I did feel more comfortable with their types of conversations, because I could have responded a bit better than a stupid blank stare and bright red cheeks.

Soon after, Nathan and I started dating. It was paradise. We never argued. We had so much fun and we understood each other better than anyone else. I think we may have been a bit of an odd couple. I was 5'2" and he was 6'3". That may have really only been the one odd thing about us.

Old Flames Part 1

In high school its not surprising to have a ton of crushes on people and for me at least, have most of those crushes really go nowhere. I only really remember a few names of my crushes. I think my first was Andrew Cramer. I was in 5th grade. Then I think it was Adam. . . something. I can't remember his last name. That was 8th grade. And then there was Nathan Hale. At first, he was the kid I would probably have never paid attention to and now he's the one that will always be in my high school memories. I remember the very first time we ever actually met. He and I were in the same class together. I can't remember which class, but I know exactly the room and I know we played the stock market there. I walked in and sat down on the side of the class and there was Nathan and Scott Varcoe talking up a storm about nonsense I'm sure. I smiled at both of them and sat down in front of Nathan intend on doing my work and minding my own business.

You have to know something here. When Nathan and Scott are put together, funny things just happen.Both of them were goof balls. Nathan had embraced his goofy-ness to the fullest and was very open about it. Scott was more contained... unless he was with Nathan. Or at least that's how it seemed to me.

I tried so hard to ignore them in class and focus on my work, but the teacher probably found my head turned around more and more each day. And I found myself liking Nathan more and more every day. Sorry all you other boys out there. But Nathan was my only true crush in high school. We built our relationship the right way, everything else was just heavy duty flirting as far as I'm concerned. Sorry. We eventually switched seats again and this time Nathan and Scott moved to the back corner. By this time I just really enjoyed the guys' company, particularly Nathans. I wasn't sure if they'd want me to sit back with them, but I was reassured as Nathan made some comment that made me sure they wanted me to sit by them. We had a blast in that class. I enjoyed every single day I went there. I always looked forward to seeing Nathan. Whenever he wasn't there I was bummed, disappointed and sad. I remember one day in particular that he didn't show up. I asked Scott where he was and he told me that Nathan was at the hospital for swallowing an over-sized guitar pick. Bahahahahahahahahaha! I think this was the first time I got Nathan's number. Another kid in class thought it was HILARIOUS that Nathan swallowed a guitar pick and thought up the genius idea to call him. Never-mind the fact that he'd just had a tube shoved down his throat and a guitar pick pulled BACK out of his throat. He was going to call him. I somehow got roped into talking to him on the phone and finally had his number. :)

In our conversations he told me once where he sort of lived. I convinced Melissa once to walk home with me and walk past where he sort of said he lived in the hopes that I would see him. Later I found out that he lived in the very very back of the neighborhood he was talking about and that my walk with Melissa was completely pointless and much longer than it had to be.

To be continued....

Daily Doubles Moment

Before high school most things were just easy for me. Track in middle school wasn't really all that serious, I could hide behind the track in a field instead of actually working. But in high school, things were pumped up a level or more. Its a known fact that new kids, the freshman, are despised. Why? Because they're immature, they're annoying, they think they're SOOO cool. However, when I was a freshman I didn't realize any of these things. I just remember being scared and nervous about being accepted. Which, I obviously wasn't accepted at first, unless it was by my own peers.

A friend of mine, Mal and I, had played soccer together for a very long time. We didn't quite get along at first, but then we grew to enjoy each others' company. We were SO excited for our first days of Daily Double in soccer. There were lots of other girls our age there and we felt pretty confident in our 14-15 year old skills. Mal and I were tiny, we were fast, and we loved soccer! The other old girls loved to scowl at us. Not all of them, but it sure felt that way. We finished off our first rounds of Daily Doubles and decided that because we were so independent that we would go get some lunch before the next set of doubles began. We went to Taco Bell. Apparently this made the upperclassmen hate us even more. "You're going to vomit that all up you know!", "What were you thinking!? That's so bad for you!" And then a lot of scoffs and scowls from those who didn't want to say anything. I don't know about Mal, but I was embarrassed, felt stupid, and was annoyed at myself for messing up. That was the last day we went to Taco Bell EVER while doing Daily Doubles and not because we puked. We actually dominated that day. We just stopped because we wanted to be liked.